Day 26 - 2 miles

TGIF. Lots to complete this weekend....

1. Bridesmaid invite project

2. Start Half Marathon training

3. Read a book before the end of the month

4. Watch Jane By Design

5. Final stops to wedding dress boutiques (narrowing down the choices)

6. Research Pilates, Barre, Yoga studios....I need to incorporate one of these workouts a couple times a week

7. Scratch #6. I need to find a gym because I need to incorporate weight training too.

8. Research Save the Dates.

9. Learn how to use Pinterest

10. Weekend dinner dates with our friends Molly & Jason on Sat, Grace and Keith on Sun

11. Haircut/mani/pedi (I dread this the most. I'm horrible at sitting still. I get so antsy and would rather be running around doing other things. I can't get around it though. Fingers and toes look like werewolf's hands and feet. Hair looks like dog fur. Flat dog fur.)

Things I'm grateful for...

1. Sushi Thursday w/Steve. New place called Hooked. It was okay. The company was much better than the food.

2. Went to 2 dress shops. Ended up liking a dress that I wouldn't have imagined on me. Not sure if it's the one though. I love it and I hate it. I love the fit (because it makes me look smaller than I really am) but I think it's too mermaid-y. I'll take the MOHs with me this weekend. Full dress review next week.

3. New case of energy gels arrived and new training program arrived. Time to get cranking. No excuses.

Day 25 - 3 mile walk

As much as my rep drives me nuts, we have actually been successful at selling together so hopefully we can keep it up.

I'm trying not to be overly critical about him. Here's the thing: He can sell. He is just rude and beyond obnoxious. Just a few things this week...

1. We were having lunch after our first appt. He wanted to take his leftovers home so the server said they would box it up for him. This is the dialogue between us:

Rep: I like it when they box it for you. I hate when they bring the box to me and have me do it. I'm paying for the service.
Me: I'm fine with whatever. I don't mind boxing it myself.
Rep: You're not used to high end restaurants. All high end restaurants box things for you.

We were at casual Greek restaurant.

2. After every appt we go on together, he gets into the car and says:

Rep: I seriously amaze myself. Did you hear me in there? I'm blown away by how great I sound in meetings. I sound like I've been doing this forever.
Me: You did a good job but there are a few things you can work on (I give him the 3 things). I also don't want you to get too excited. I've been doing this a long time and it's not that easy. You may think you have seen buying signals but we need to do a better job tightening things up so that you don't leave money behind, etc. I forecast that prospect to be a 25% chance of closing.
Rep: With your selling abilities it's about 25%, for me it would be 90%.

We'll see how this deal ends up.

I seriously hear at least 10 things like this come out of his mouth everyday. I bite my tongue on the personal lame jabs but when it comes to work related comments, I will give him my 2 cents.

Overall, these are signs of insecurity. He talks about himself and how great he is constantly. I'm trying to be more compassionate and understanding because he is insecure.

I know when I'm insecure, I may not resort to what he's doing but I do act differently and act irrationally. For example, I got home last night from being out of town since Monday. Steve had a Sales Kick Off Meeting from Mon-Wed. He said he would try to be home around 7-8 last night. I got home at 8. He didn't get home until 10. Shouldn't he be so excited to see me? After all, I've been gone for 3 days??!?!?! Wouldn't he want to be home by the time I got home? Nope. He had drinks with his work friends.

When he got home, I was in bed watching tv and on the IPAD looking at wedding stuff. I was grumpy and moody. He comes home all normal and cheery. Gives me a kiss and says, "HI! You're home!" I'm still really quiet, focused on the IPAD, and I say, "I've been researching stuff for our weeding for the past 2 hours." (It was more like 15 min. I had really been catching up on the Kardashians). So I start giving him the silent treatment. (YES, I know I'm being irrational and petty.)

Then I said, "I use my free time wisely to plan our wedding." So basically I'm implying that he's not using his time wisely. He gets into bed and says, "I want to help you. What can I do?" I respond with, "I can do it myself." Again, silence. Then he just lays there with his head on my shoulder and just watches what I'm doing. It's hard for me to stay mad at Steve because I know he doesn't mean to hurt my feelings. It's not like he said, "I'm not going home! I don't care if she gets in tonight." Usually he is home when I get back from a trip. I just get worked up about things. So I guess I should think about myself and my actions and the things that I say when I'm feeling upset or insecure about something. It doesn't come off really pretty. Anyways, I got over my grumpy mood 10 mins after he got into bed.

Day 24 - 4 Miles

Yesterday I wrapped up Day 2 with my rep. Only 1 more day to go this week and 5 more weeks remaining with him. Working with him has made me realize how lucky and fortunate I was at YB when I worked with great people who became wonderful friends.

When I get frustrated and annoyed by the obnoxious things that my FL guy says, I try to give myself a reality check...."I would be annoyed by any rep after spending 3 days with him/her every week, right?" Actually no. I would have been thrilled to spend 3 days with Caroline, Amy, and Stacey when they were on my team. Instead of complaining about this guy, I should be happy that this is really the only time in my 12 year career where I've had to work with a rep like him.

Things I'm grateful for....

1. I received great news this week...my friends Amy and Rishi are having another baby! They are due in Aug! So excited for them!!!

2. My friends who volunteer. My BFF Jill is a board member for the Chris4Life Foundation which was created to fight colon cancer. She is a mother who has a full time job while managing her responsibilities at Chris4Life. She spends tireless hours each week getting donations, planning events, and raising awareness.

In March, Chris4Life will hold their annual 5K in DC....

http://www.scopeitout5k.com/

It will be great event! Hope to see our local friends there!

3. My friend Talin's friend is also hosting a race the same weekend of the Chris4Life 5K. You can do both races because they are on separate days.

The proceeds go to the National Brain Tumor Society and Life with Cancer. The link is below if you want to check it out...

www.runrogue5k.com

So grateful to have friends that raise awareness to important causes. Since I don't volunteer, participating in these events is my small way of giving back. Thanks for all the hard work you guys do!

Day 23 - 5K

I arrived in FL yesterday. You know the drill - 3 days in FL with my favorite rep. Joy!

Yesterday during my run, I thought a lot about kids and having a family. Before I get into my thoughts, I must provide details about me and the idea of kids. I have never been a baby person. If I'm out in public, I don't ooh and ahh over strangers' babies that I see. I ooh and ahh over my friends' kids because they are an extension of my friends.

This is who I have always been. Growing up, I had Cabbage Patch dolls but I never played house or nurtured my dolls. They just sat on my shelf looking pretty and clean. I never dreamed of being a mom. I dreamed of working in Corporate America.

Enter Steve. Being with Steve made me realize, "I want a mini Steve." It could be a boy or girl but I want another version of him. I also know Steve would be a great dad. As for me, I'm not sure what kind of mother I would be. The reason I say this is because I don't have the fun-loving, kid-like gene inside of me. Here is what I mean....

As I was running on the beach today, I saw a family with 2 young kids. Probably around ages 5-7. Each of them were out with their metal detectors looking for coins or treasure buried in the sand. The kids were getting into it . They were running all over the place looking for things. The parents were really into it too. I ran by thinking, "That would be so boring. They're not going to find anything. I wouldn't want to do that with my kids."

Then another example would be when Steve and I were driving by Dulles Airport (our International Airport). There was a huge banner that said: Annual Airplane Pull on Saturday at 3 pm. Tickets are $20. I looked over at Steve and said, "What are they going to do? Pull an airplane? Who would pay $20 to watch an airplane being pulled?" Steve responded with, "Kids love it! We would bring our kid to watch it and the kids get to participate too." OH BOY, that sounds really exciting to me. I can't wait.

Then I get worried about prioritizing my time and how my personal schedule is going to take a back seat. For example, my GFs are always running around taking their kids to practice during the weekdays and then to games and multiple birthday parties on the weekends. I listen to their schedules and I think, "OMG, how am I going to do this? That would suck." Although I think it is very important for kids to be in activities and have friends parties to go to. I would want that for my child too. It's just a lifestyle change that is daunting.

I don't play games or watch animated movies. My friends all love kids movies and I don't get into it. I don't have a goofy bone in me. When I see my friends' kids, I have adult conversations with them like, "So what are you learning at school? Let's talk about it." I don't go out and play with them. Steve, loves going out and playing with the kids. My friends kids now ask me when Steve is coming over. They don't ask about me.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. I have plenty of other worries like getting pregnant (when we want to), going through changes in your body, delivering a baby, changes in our marriage.....so many of these things terrify me.

Day 20-22 0 Miles

No running this weekend. I have an excuse though ---- all the trails were icy because we had freezing rain. Even though that is true, I still didn’t want to run. I’m just burned out and need a break. Also, I think my mini Florida trips during the week have made me into a wuss with the cold weather. I’m now used to running in the 60s and70s 3 days a week so I’m dreading the 40 degree temps. I would typically consider 40s to be comfortable (for winter). I suck.

I had a great weekend though! I met with my friend Asad and his future wife Hudeida. Asad and I work together at Thomas. He is one of our Application Engineers so he’s my go-to-guy with all my idiotic technical questions. Asad is a valuable asset to our sales team. As long as we can qualify a lead and determine there is a need with a prospect, Asad takes over and manages the technical discussions and leads us to a close.

Asad and Hudeida just started dating 2 months ago! He lives in NYC and Hudeida lives in VA. They were set up on a blind date. They are both Pakistani so it is very important to their families that they marry a Pakistani. Well, this is the first Pakistani that Asad has ever dated. He didn’t have high expectations going into the blind date but it turned out great. Now they’re scheduled to get married in June! Yes, this June!

Their relationship is definitely unique. There is a formal process involved with the meeting of the parents. This meeting takes place over several steps so it’s not just the typical let’s all go out to dinner and meet. They also don’t have sex until they’re married. Okay, I must admit that is stunning to me. I know people out there practice this but I don’t know anyone that has. I’m not judging people if they practice this belief. Anyways, I started thinking about how this is such a “foreign” concept to me. I’m so not used to it that I have resorted to saying and thinking rude things…. For example, On Sat morning, Steve was on his way out the door to officiate a high school wrestling match and he asked me what I was doing during the day. I respond, “I’m meeting with the couple that isn’t having sex until they get married.” He looks at me and says, “The engineer at your work, right?” Well, Steve put it much nicer. After all, that’s what Asad should be known for. Not whether he is having sex or not.

Then when I was at lunch with Asad and Hudeida, I asked Hudeida why she wasn’t going to Puerto Rico with us (we have our National Sales Meeting there next week). She said her parents won’t let her. I respond with, “Can’t you just tell your parents you are going to a law conference (she’s an attorney)?” I’m now asking her to lie. I’m used to lying to my parents so it doesn’t phase me that lying is not good. My parents are just like their parents. Really strict. Really conservative. They never let me date until I got out of college. They would die if they knew I wasn’t a virgin – they think I’m still a virgin. So obviously I had to lie about a lot of things to my parents. I don’t believe I lied about anything that was detrimental to myself or to others but it’s still a lie.

So after I asked her to lie to her parents, she looked at me and politely said, “No, I can’t do that.” It dawned on me at that moment that she has so many easy outs here. She could have sex, she could go on the trip. She doesn’t need to tell her parents any of this. However, she puts her family above her wants and needs. I admire her for respecting their culture and their religion. I also admire Asad for respecting her wishes too.

Things I’m grateful for….

1. I always enjoy seeing my friends meeting “the one” . I see positive changes and differences in their lives. I see a spark that I haven’t seen before and it’s neat to see how my friends make certain choices to be with someone because that person makes them so happy.

After Steve’s match and my lunch, we got home and cleaned out all our closets. Right now our closets are only filled w/clothes that we wear. Yippee!

Day 19 - 5K

Yesterday I ran on a treadmill because it was raining in FL. I hate running on treadmills. A 5K feels like 10 miles.

Day 18 - 70 min

Yesterday I ran for 70 min. Not sure of the distance because I didn't track my miles or pace. Short post today because I slept in.